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Angst,
Diaryland:

We're all angsty as shit.

I'm having an on/off week; as per usual.

The low points being that Harper got in.. with a majority, and I'm still sleeping randomly. But, more so the Harper thing.

I did the advance poll dealio -- but only because Sarah did. I was a holy terror there, at the polling station, too. Picture this: I'm all duded-up, sleep-depping, and debating politics with a miniature elderly European immigrant. "Harper's the only one saving this country!" she tells me, jabbing me in the chest. "Oh, yes -- protecting the artic north, from those insidious American invaders..." You know, the land that the Inuits don't inhabit...

Picture this: amidst a crowd of about 60, all but 3 of us are 60+, and voting for Harper. The remaining 3 are 23 and under, all voting for Layton. No wonder the NDP lost..?

So: election day comes. I'm expecting one of two outcomes: a micro-minority for Harper, or a minority for Layton.

By about 7 PM, I finally hit the internet to see that Layton only lost by 30-or-so seats. The Harp-Darp? Dude, the motherfucker got his first (in, what 3 elections?) majority.

Motherfuck. There goes my sex change, yo. There goes the minimum wage hike. Fuck, he might even cancel my Disability check. Welcome to the 50s.

So, yeah. I'm fucking miserable over this. Yes, yes, yes: I bought in to Layton's sweet little socialist promises, with much hope. But he lost, so.. no hope there.

The other surprise of the evening was that the Bloc Quebecois got toasted. Wellp.. no loss there. The Greens finally got a seat; I suspect this is due to young voters confusing them with the Marijuana Party...

Aside from this news, I have more:

I went on a POF date; didn't actually talk to the girl, because I didn't recognize her. I would have.. if not for those whopping sunglasses. (Seriously. These were massive.) She would have approached me, she said, if I hadn't been seated with my old-as-fuck male neighbors. In all of our defenses, all the tables were full, and it's mighty uncomfy to stand still for an hour in cowboy boots.

Tonight was my mom's 10th AA birthday. Mike skipped out on giving her her cake, so I did it. Again.. I notice this weird trend in AA: no matter who mentions my mother's isolation, no one capitalizes on contacting her. I'm listening, for many a minute, to members talking about how close they all are, how they all have a bond.

If they're so close.. why is no one noticing Mom doing her Suffer Alone crap? On the bright side, she tells me she's perking up, this month.

I'm worried about her; no confidants, no friends over. Not too many calls to friends... But, this has been going on for months.

I've approached about 4 of her closest AA buds. Every single one said something to the effect of, "Nah, she'll call me."

Despite saying, "If she doesn't call you -- something's up -- call her", I don't expect a single one of them to actually take this seriously. There's only so much whining/encouraging I can do about these AA meetings/outings, you know?

This bugs me, a fair bit. No matter how many times she's let slip to this crowd that she's hermiting, troubled.. zip. I seem to remember them being a lot more supportive than this. More.. concerned. More alert, even.

I kind of feel let down, actually. I respect a lot of these people. It's frustrating to see them let Mom flounder alone.

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Circa 2010