Wasn't sure where I left off --
Last you checked in, maybe I was still in the hospital...
I got out; it's been something in the nature of a month of freedom. I had at least 3 weeks of continued psychotic elements, followed by a very sudden drop back in to almost-normal.
What bothered me is no one gave me any room for error or recovery, upon getting out -- the solo exception being The Boyfriend, who is a gift from above, or something.. he "got" that I'm just starting to piece shit back in line -- everyone seemed to think I was just gunna pick up like nothing happened.
Tons happened. I was gone from my normal life for almost 4 months. This was insane. Definitely not as "Woo, thanks, now I have PTSD" as usual, but still a scarring experience in its own way.
Normal people DO NOT FUCKING GET how fucked up psych wards "treat" their "patients"; it's a Nazi science experiment, drug testing, abuse tolerance learning experience. You have less rights than a jailbird -- the cops, the doctors, the shrinks, the nurses, etc -- they treat you like they own you.. down to giving you meds they KNOW will cause bad effects for you, your mind, and especially YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS. You are treated like a 5 year old criminal.
It's almost like unreal; people see some of this in media.. media gives you a vague dreading of ever going, and often depicts to some degree how gross those places are kept.
Yet.. they bring you there.
There needs to be a therapy spa version. Jail is NOT where you put someone when their mind is broken. You put them somewhere nice, so they fucking HEALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.