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We have
Two dynamics at work in my life.

1 --
* The antidepressant is working, so:
a) I go out more
b) I call people almost daily; I have 4, mostly female, relatives that I call, plus Sarah

2 --
* I keep contact more faithfully, and am mostly the only one bothering, and thus:
a) Some people are thrilled
b) I've officially weirded out my family with my un-Lambert social keening

People who are thrilled:
- Jay
- Grandma
- Mom

People who are a little less:
- Stepmom
- Dad
- Anni
- Sarah (if I call 3+ days in a row)

Granted; Anni likes that I call.. I think. I think it never really occurs to her to call me/Mom. I was like that, a few years back. I hardly thought of my family.. though.. I was batshit bananas, and drooling all the time. Whoopie!

Stepmom and I had a.. 2-3--?--hour call. She rambled, I asked random questions. Told her a lot of the usual rah-rah about, "Treat me like a lobotomized child", and, "I'm not a bitch anymore -- I'm just annoying", and totally tossing her concepts of me to the shitter. Well. I hope. Mexico? Forgot the, "Hey, baby, let's go somewhere" part of the Diego shit. Pressed mostly the, "I was looking at the stripper [and resisted his advances; was enraged that he went after Anni when I told him off]" part.

Stepmom accepts the lesbianauge as a guise, but not a reality. "Be yourself, but no demonstrations, or reminders, please," was the gist. You know me, Internet; intended or no, I made a few references to my sex life being dead -- but very homo. She needs to know, methinks, for sure, that I would never have touched Diego. Fucking slimy bastard that he was. Mexican resort playboy -- fucking weird shit, man.

I did a lot of listening; that's fine with me. It was odd, though -- she'd beg off to go off-phone.. then find something new to talk about. Was she real surprised we could carry a conversation [more often than once every 5 years]? It was nice, I'll admit.

I rather like the idea of her trusting me not to be my 12-year old douche self.

If Jay is a measure of my potential for trust -- which, as usual, he's become a holder of the sanity meter again as well -- I suspect Stepmom will eventually grow to see me as I am: harmless, awkward, and naive. Sooner or later, we may actually get down to having her as some part of my life.

Before one of us is gone.

Other news:

Mom's out of town for a funeral; left my brother with Caesar -- he is OUUUUUT of the house at the end of the month. THAT news is why I called Dad's house, seeking Anni, to give her the update.

Ho-cha.

Fuckin' A.

You Missed:

*DISCLAIMER
* WHO TF IS ALL THIS??!
* INTRO, 2
* NAQ

Backlog:

Circa 2010